Getting Over Someone

Basic question here: how can I tell when I’m over someone and ready to be with someone else?

- C.G., Boston, MA

That is a basic question, but not a simple one. I’m not sure I can even answer it.

Sometimes hearing someone else’s experiences put things in perspective. Here is a situation concerning a person I dated, how I personally view it, and how I make it work for me. Maybe this example will help clear things up a little bit for you too.

In my life, I’ve seen a lot of relationships and been envious of very few. I see a lot of phoniness, relationships of convenience, and people together for all the wrong reasons.

But I knew that my relationship with her was something incredibly, incredibly special. I’d never felt anything like that; it was something totally different than all the rest I’d ever been in. It was comparing apples to oranges, as the saying goes.

In every way, I found her to be the most beautiful thing that I’d ever seen. We showed each other our best and our worst and remained together because we believed in each other as individuals and believed in us as a couple.

It’s interesting to think of all the things we are taught and all we are not. People are taught a million things growing up: how to read, how to use a stove without burning their hands, how to fold a towel, how to drive, and so on.

But we’re never taught some of the things that are imperative in relationships; we’re somehow expected to learn them as we go and by trial and error. I, like many others, never learned how to trust someone to give them all of my feelings, so I’d always held something back, which isn’t fair.

I also never learned how to forgive someone that I loved when they hurt me. And I certainly never learned what to do when you find someone who is perfect for you. It sounds like such a great thing, but it can be one of the most overwhelming feelings you ever experience because you want it to work out more than you want anything else in your life.

And sometimes, by the time you start to realize these things, it’s too late to make everything right.

Making her cry was the worst thing I’ve ever done and just thinking about it hurts me more than anything I’ve ever lost, never achieved, failed at, or I could really explain here.

And now she’s gone. We had talked about “forever” but this isn’t the kind of “forever” I thought we meant.

Who we were at the time we made our memories, we’ll always be – that man will always love that woman and that woman will always love him just as much. I still miss so many things about her, namely counting on – and believing in – us.

I still think about her every day and wonder, wonder, and wonder. I made her an enormous part of my life and now that she’s gone, that life as I knew it is too.

The pain is normal. But don’t think that because you feel pain you can’t move on. What happened between the two of you obviously affected you, so the hurting is expected. Truthfully, and unfortunately, it may be felt for a long, long time.

If you think about it, you probably still don’t feel great about the moment you found out you didn’t get that job you really wanted or a pet that died when you were a kid. You may never feel perfectly fine about this situation either.

What I realized, and what you must too, is that you have to move on. They have. They have their own life going, and whether it’s them being alone or them being with someone else – it’s still them being without you.

There is no other option; you can’t stay closed off and emotionally unavailable forever in hopes they will change their mind about you or that it will work out somehow. Knowing when to let go and move forward it is the hard part.

You don’t want to do it when you’re emotionally unavailable, angry at life, or will be anything but the best person you can be to whomever it is you end up with next. I don’t know if you’re there. Maybe you don’t even know if you’re there.

Video Games Becoming Addictive To Children

Parents, teachers, and adults are beginning to wonder with all the research being done on video games if children are not becoming obsessive even addictive to video games. Most of the research that has been complete have focused on video games that have more of a violent theme due to the behavior now appearing in children.

Researchers do feel that there is a connection between violent video games and violent behavior in children. It is felt that when these violent video games are played repeatedly then the children will have aggressive thoughts and become less helpful to others and less sociable as well. In video games where the goal is to kill as many characters as you possible can, then the objective turns into the violent the kills are the more points that they will collect. While a child is playing such a game ninety-nine percent of the time their heart rate will increase dramatically due to the affect the game is having on them.

A study was done by three teenagers and was put on observation at an International Science and Engineering Fair in Cleveland, Ohio that showed how video games affected children who played them. The study showed that people, not only children, or all ages had a rise in blood pressure and heart rate after they played a super violent video game. However, when the same person played a nonviolent video game did not have the the same effect as the violent video game.

Children all over the world play these violent video games every day and some play for more than three or four hours a day. There will always be a debate as to whether violent video games can actually make an individual have behavior that is of an aggressive and violent nature, but the fact is that these video games are addictive to children. It is true that playing video games can help children develop their visual skills while learning about computers, which may help them in school. In fact, studies are now showing that video games can be helpful for children.

The fact is that video games are proving to help children that labeled ADD or ADHD learn how to focus their attention. Video games are often innocent bystanders to the problems in society. Video games have the potential to inspire children to learn if it is presented in the right manner to children. Video games have already proven to have the capability of improving the coordination and visual skills of children that play them.

Children tend to choose video games that have the combination of being challenging, entertaining, and complicated. Many of these video games can take up to one hundred hours of play to complete and most children will have their concentration focused on the video game the entire time. Children that are labeled with ADD and ADHD by teachers are those children that can not sit still in school, but this might just be because they find the school work boring, because the majority of these children can spend hours trying to make it to the next level of a video game.

These same children, who professionals feel can not pay attention, can play a video game for ten straight hours if given the opportunity simply because the game focuses their attention in a way school is unable to try, which is interactive. These children are not simply sitting and watching, but are participating in what is going on and solving problems.

Juggernaut Or Not: Card Games To Select From

Cards is an ancient pastime that over the ages has only picked up popularity and fans. During childhood simple games such as War are explained and then used as a learning tools for helping totters appreciate the world of numbers. As people grow up they begin to play more complicated games that rely on strategy and skill to determine outcome. I have surveyed some of the more popular ones and compiled a list of the toughest and the easiest to learn.

Snap Your Fingers, Soak Them Up:
1) Full and Complete Attack
Based on simple arithmetic, this game using all the 52 cards (including as many jokers as you wish), is one of the all time favorites of children. Neither does it need any strategy nor does it require any particular skill! Full and Complete Attack is generally the first game that children are taught because it not only improves their numerical skills, but adds enjoyment and action to this process.

2) Liar:
Here, all cards lower than eight are removed from the deck, and then seven cards are dealt. The remainder is placed down and one card is placed face-up. According to that card, the player in turn places cards facing down on top of that card. He has to state what card it is, but he can lie. If someone thinks is has lied, they can challenge him and reveal the card. If the player lied, he has to pick up all the cards, if not the challenger does the honors. The goal is to finish all the cards in your hand.

3) Johnny 5:
Johnny 5 is a little more difficult then the first to games but still is very simple to learn. Each player is dealt 5 cards. The left over cards are placed in the center of the table face down the player to the dealers left the may put down a pair of cards or a r 3 card run of cards. If you do not have any the player must take a card. The object of the game is to get rid of all your cards and to have you last one or 2 cards total 5.

4) Joining the Fray:
One of the more entertaining games (especially for children), it requires basic colour and number combinatory skills only. You have to match numbers such as by collecting all fours and all aces, and then release all your cards onto the game deck. The focus of this game is not that much on winning, but on not losing and that is what adds the extra spice to it. It does not matter who throws his cards down first, but the player who notices it last and his cards are the last to hit the table: loses.

List of Most Difficult Games to Learn
1) Bridge:
An old but still popular game, here, you partner with someone and decide before playing how many hands you will win. The complexity of bridge lies not in the rules, which are relatively easy to pick up, but in the intricate game plans and maneuvers one has to master to play well.

2) Dragon Poker:
Dragon Poker is not totally unlike poker. Any of the different variations of poker can be used as the base for the game, but the general rules are very different. There are no official rules for dragon poker, they must be thought up and written down by the group of people you are playing with, and it is the duty of each player to memorize the rules, if you forget a rule it goes against you and if someone else does not remember a rule that can hurt you, do not worry you do not have to remind them. The best games have the most rules. An example of a rule can be if the date ends in an odd number and the dealer is wearing a shirt that the color of the shits spelling is an even number, then each player must pay the dealer 100 dollars. This rule can only be used once and whoever is the first to call out the rule during their deal gets it.

3) Baccarat:
Just like in poker, you have to study and memorize the value of certain cards such as that tens and face cards (Jack to King including Ace) are zero. In addition, you need to learn specific rules such as that if you get an eight or nine no more cards are dealt. To conclude, this game is not for beginners.

Sex Talks: Help! My Kid’s The Town Crier!

Talking to our kids about sex is challenging – for everyone, even me! You feel anxious about all kinds of things like their loss of innocence, or telling everyone and their cousin. You worry they’ll go out and try it or will think that by talking to them you’re giving them permission to do it. You worry about what other parents (and your parents!) will think if you talk to your kid at a young age.

But, you’re feeling great! You whacked up the ginger and read ALL of Robie Harris and Michael Emberley’s “It’s SO Amazing!” book about how babies are made to your 8 year old. She was a little grossed out, had some questions and seemed to understand how sex works. Whew! You are on your way to some great conversations.

You even remembered to tell her “This is a private conversation we have in our family and not with other kids or adults. Other moms and dads want to be the ones to tell their kids about this important part of life. You can always talk to me about it if you have questions or concerns.” Super! You rock!

And then…your lovely child heads straight to her best friend at school and fills her in on all the details! And then you get a call from the friends’ outraged parents and maybe even the school. Not a great moment in sex education history, but not to worry, all is not lost.

Consider this – You’ll probably spend 10 or 15 minutes on the phone with the upset parent explaining your beliefs about sex and kids and that you asked your daughter not to talk to other kids about this. You will apologize, tell them that you’ll remind her of this and then offer the parent a resource for getting more info about talking to kids.

Now consider this – You want to have open and consistent conversations with your child about sexuality, love and relationships throughout her youth, right? This is the most important part of this scenario – your relationship with your child.

When you compare the two, which is more important? The freaked out adult who now is forced into having a conversation they should be having anyway? Or your child who knows you are a trustworthy resource and will look to you for help and support for years to come?

When you start these conversations with your children I strongly recommend you tell the parents of her closest buddies, your parents and any other adult she has regular contact with. They need to know so they can step in if she starts blabbing, asks them questions or the like. It’s easier on everyone if they are prepared in advance for any little surprises.

When my son was about 3 or 4 we had read parts of “It’s SO Amazing.” He loved looking at the pictures of bodies and was very into reading this book. One day he was at my in-law’s house and he looked at my lovely mother-in-law and announced “You have a vagina!” She knew we’d been reading this book and took it in stride. We had prepared her for moments like this.

When it comes to talking to your kids about sex, you cannot worry about what the neighbors might think. The most important relationship is the one with your child. So take a deep breath, exhale, and get ready for the next conversation.

Why Real Estate Investing Will Always Be Very Profitable

In recent months there has been a lot of talk about a crash in the real estate market.

Analysts predict a housing bust. News reports indicate that home sales are declining in several markets all over the country. This paints the picture that real estate investing is no longer a lucrative business. Investors all over the country are advised to get out of the game as quickly as possible to avoid losses.

What analysts and news reports don’t tell you is that every decade for the past forty years there has been some kind of warning about a crash in the real estate market. Each time these warning come out, people begin to mistrust real estate investing.

They turn their sights to other forms of investing. Analysts to preach this gloom and doom on the real estate market also do not understand that real estate investing is much different than stock investing. The same rules and trends do not apply.

Every decade when analysts state their predictions for a real estate market crash there are some real estate investors who heed this advice. These investors eventually regret doing so once they realize that there was no cause for alarm in real estate investing. Smart investors, on the other hand, realize that there is always money to be made in real estate investing and they know exactly why.

Humans have only a few basic needs. These basic needs never change, they never go away. These needs include food, clothing, and shelter.

The constant need for shelter lies at the root of the reason that real estate investing will remain profitable. Of course, there are some other key elements, but the least you need to know is that humans will always need real estate.

Even if real estate somehow dwindles from a structure with walls and a roof to a measly hole in the ground, it is still considered shelter. Someone has to provide these holes in the ground. Some holes will end up being better than other holes. Some people will have the means to buy and sell multiple holes. Real estate investing will continue to exist.

The real estate market alone will never experience a crash. In all the years that real estate has been around, the market has never crashed. The only time you will see a negative impact on the entire real estate market is when the general market experiences a downfall as well. However, when this happens, the value of all other commodities will decrease at the same time. Even in this case, real estate investing can still prove to be profitable.

You might see a local real estate market decline as a result of another catastrophe, such as New Orleans in the case of Hurricane Katrina. Because of a natural disaster, the majority of the real estate in the area was lost. There were no properties for homeowners to purchase. A key thing to know in real estate investing is that local markets always correct themselves. The disastrous loss in the New Orleans area created a huge opportunity for real estate investing.

Although the real estate markets in various cities might fluctuate from time to time, the real estate market as a whole will never experience a serious decline. This is the reason that real estate investing will remain a lucrative form of investing.

Financial Planning Software

When it comes to planning your financial well-being, it might be helpful to use one of the many tools available today. Some of these tools include financial planning software. Depending on the type of software you purchase, it could help you in a variety of different areas, such as planning for your retirement or keeping track of your personal and business dealings. Many of the financial planning software that is available today can do all of this and so much more.

There are several different types of financial planning software available on the market today, that you will have no problems in finding one. However, whichever type you choose, you should ensure that it performs exactly as you need it to, in your financial planning venture. For example, some software can help you in managing and calculating your 401k, estimate the costs of college or savings, keep track of your stock portfolio, or analyze the goals of your IRA.

Some other features include keeping track of your profit and loss in regards to your business, balancing your checking account or multiple accounts; maintain a organized list of your customers, contacts, or even employees. There are so many features that come with various financial planning software that it is imperative that you research the software to ensure it can offer you exactly what you need.

The prices vary greatly depending on the financial planning software you purchase. For example, the latest version of Microsoft Money Home and Business, which is perfect for home-based business owners, personal finances, or businesses that employ less than five people, runs for a cost of around $60.00.

The financial planning software that is the most popular and used by many is Quicken. The home and business version of Quicken, gives you power to categorize expenses both personal and business, in efforts to help you when it comes to taxes and reports. Quicken helps you in finding all the deductions you can claim and simplifies the process of preparing your taxes, as well as helping you in managing your flow of cash in an effective manner. This program runs at a cost of about $80.00.

Of course, the choice is yours and you should only make the decision after conducting research on the different financial planning software, determining what your needs are, comparing prices, and comparing support of the company. Make sure when you make any type of investment that you only do so after gaining knowledge and the best information.

Marketing Education And Training: Mlm Secret Profits

When you start in the network marketing business, it is usually because of a couple of reasons. You are fed up with your job. You need more money than your job can give you; or, you simply want to start a business that will be with you for the long term. Many people start in the network marketing business because they believe that following an already organized, successful plan is easier than trying to create a business plan, product or service and promotional materials to get things off the ground. In many respects, network marketing takes care of many of the baffling, hard parts of business startup.

That’s the advantage of getting started with network marketing. The disadvantage to it is that they have no idea how the plan really comes together or how to judge whether the plan is good or bad at the outset. They are aware of how they need to network and far too many of them think that it ends with begging friends and family into helping them! While the plan is there, implementing it is a lot more difficult but very doable.

Prior to starting out, people need to be trained. Marketing education and training comes before prospecting MLM partners and associates because what a person learns and knows needs to be translated and transferred to the people being recruited in order to build a successful organization where everyone makes money. Lured by the hype, most new network marketers need training to get the information needed to make the product or service they are about to sell workable in the long term.

One of the first things that new network marketers need to learn is how to stop harassing and prospecting MLM associates in places where most people are not comfortable talking about a business opportunity. If you see a mother with two kids in the grocery line at the supermarket, this is probably not the best place to approach her with a full blown opportunity presentation. Another favorite approach after the new marketer runs out of friends and family to talk to is they buy useless leads that are either dead or broke or both. They are, in any case, not interested and consider your call the desperate warbling of a telemarketer.

Getting the correct type of marketing education and training is also crucial. In many network marketing programs, the new associate is taught that in order to be successful, they will need to take tough action: cold calling hundreds of businesses in order to be successful at prospecting MLM associates. The other, less strenuous method is generally not taught and most often overlooked – how to build an effective lead capture system complete with lead capture pages as well as other more highly converting methods that almost guarantee a successful outcome.

Many of these techniques were viable before the Internet and network marketing systems merged. Using the latest technology coupled with revamped systems tailored to use on the web, the new methods have revolutionized the industry making business opportunities easier to work and building teams a much less arduous task. All of the new technology and systems are there, but it takes a specialized training in order to take advantage of the new systems.

New marketers these days are combining MySpace, Facebook, Youtube and other programs into methods that allow them to contact MLM associates by the thousands. If you want to get new members, you are definitely playing the numbers game, but if you learn to use these methods, you’ll find that your numbers are going to skyrocket, only because you are able to reach more people with a single effort!

As long as you have the proper marketing education and training, you are going to find that you can take your business to the next level easily. You’ll be in a place of complete abundance. Make sure that you have both the training and the technology to become the next network marketing success. This is something that is real, and within your reach!

Get Control Of Your Personal Finance With A Budget

It is fairly common knowledge that money matters can be simplified and controlled with a budget. One of the keys to personal finance management is creating and using a household budget. It is not a really hard task, but one that many people avoid. The reason is that it can often be hard to avoid overspending and having a budget really puts spending problems out there.

A budget is basically a list of expenses and income. It should include all expenses, even the seemingly little expenses like a morning coffee purchase. The budget can be made out weekly or monthly, whatever way is best for the household. For someone who gets paid once a week, a weekly budget may be best. For someone who gets paid once a month, a monthly budget would work nicely. Although, it is really a matter of personal choice as to how the budget is made out.

The income section of a budget is usually fairly simple. Most people can easily track their income. Some people choose to list their income after taxes, while others list the income before taxes and include taxes as a expense. That is strictly a matter of choice.

The expenses section is where most people have trouble. It can be hard to see our spending habits in black and white. It is really important, though, to be honest and list everything. You may find it is helpful to keep a spending log for a week. Your spending log is where you will write down every purchase you make. This can be a good way of tracking all the little expenses you incur throughout a week.

Your expenses section of your budget should also include utilities and housing expenses. If you have a car payment, include here as well. You need to include money spent on gasoline, bathroom items, food and any other thing you spend money on. You do not have to include large, one time purchases, though, as they are not a routine part of your expenses.

Once you have your income and expenses listed you need to add each up. The total of your expenses should not exceed the total of your income. If it does then you need to cut back on your expenses. You may have to stop some spending or try to find creative ways of reducing your spending.

The whole idea of a budget is to ensure that you are not spending more then you are earning. Your budget is a blueprint for how you should be spending your money. Once you have your budget made out and it is balanced you need to stick to it. Only spend as much as you have allotted in your expenses and you should find your personal finance situation becomes much easier to deal with.

Evaluate The Video Games You Are Playing

There are hundreds of video games on the market today and more are being released onto the market every day. The only problem with these video games is figuring out what games should be played by your children.

Young people are not as concerned with the contents of the video games they are playing as much as adults. That is why adults have such a strong desire to evaluate the video games their youngsters are playing. Many parents try their best to find decent video games for their youngsters to play but there are still questions that unfold in the minds of these parents when their youngsters are playing new games. Parents and adults alike are concerned with how video games that involve killing people or destroying things will effect their children in the future. They are also concerned with video games that have immoral content, illegal content, or contain occult activity. Parents have to protect their children any way they can, especially since there are so many negative influences out there for them already.

There are video games that parents will have no problem with their children playing on their video game system, which would include almost any type of sports video game such as skateboarding, baseball, or football. Video games are actually a way for children, even some adults, to take a step away from reality, but the video games should still install some type of moral values in the children.

As long as the children are not placing the playing of these video games ahead of their other responsibilities, such as school, and if they know the difference between right and wrong, then that is a different matter. The major problem is that few parents are willing to take the time to show their children what is right and what is wrong within some of the video games that they play. Instead, these parents just allow their children to sit in front of their televisions playing what ever video games they choose without any adult supervision what ever.

These video games are highly addicted to children and adults simply because in the game the player is given the ability to control every situation. Many times in the life of an individual they may feel as if their life is simply out of control and the video games allow them to feel as if they are once again in control. This is why so many adults also become addicted to these video games as well as children and another reason why they are so incredibly popular.

In real life, many children and adults find it hard to find respect or to get others to listen to them and they often become overwhelmed with life. However, these video games give them the opportunity to be respected, strong, popular, cool, and even sexy, which they strongly desire to be in real life. This is the result behind so many of these video games becoming so popular with gamers in a variety of age groups. These video games gives gamers the perception of them actually being involved in the game as being a part of the game.

It does seem a shame that these games are being developed and parents feel the need to evaluate them prior to the children participating in them due to so many of them having obscene and immoral content. It seems that the manufactures of video games could produce games that were considered to be more along the lines of family games. These video games would be worth while and would not have such a diverse effect upon children as some of the games being produced now.

Gambling Addiction Can Ruin You

Everyone in this world wants to make money; easy money is something that involves a hell lot of risk. Gambling is said to be the thing that can make you rich but can also make you bankrupt. When in Vegas people say nothing is better than the gambling casinos in Vegas. A place where a person might come as a pauper and leave with a money but what happens in a reverse scenario, a person that is supposed to be a millionaire might become a beggar. Gambling is a common thing with many people around who spend money on betting, some turn out to be the winners and some loose. A visit to a casino doesn’t mean that it is a bad habit, it is just the testing of ones luck. But a frequent visit to a gambling station would mean that you are addicted to gambling. The legal gambling industry is on an all time high in America. Where you get gambling casinos in your home town, and the Internet that seems to have made the world small.

Gambling can be of various types such as at casinos, card rooms, mobile gambling, Internet and many various types of gambling that people are addicted to. Gambling involves a lot of stake where your money is put to the ultimate test of dragging in along more money but this might not turn out to be the case, and you might find yourself loosing. Your luck is tested and said to turn negative, but it is not that you were unlucky. In fact you were foolish where you kept on loosing even though there were no signs of winning and then you start cursing yourself by saying that you are a person that has all the ill luck in the world. A pathological gambler will find problems such as family ones, debts, suicidal tendencies and many more. In order to triumph over your bad habit of gambling problem you can look for help from a hypnosis session that you can conduct your self.

Gambling is looked upon as an illness that is chronic and progressive but can be treated with timely help. Hypnosis is said to be the solution to your problem as in the past it has treated many addictions such as alcohol, drugs, etc. Gambling is also stated as an addiction. One that is addicted by gambling can get help with hypnosis treatment. A victorious person or a businessman might have nothing left other than debts if he is a constant gambler. If you are a person who is addicted to gambling then you should look for the mp3 download. They are sought after by many people all around the world for its overall success to overcome gambling addiction. Mp3 downloads helps your stressed and anxious mind set free and stop doing wrong things and take in only things that which have positive results. These will calm your nerves and enable you to perceive life with a correct approach. It helps you control and stop your inkling towards gambling.